Inner Growth

How to Get out of Overwhelm as a Coach

Most coaches I know are feeling pretty overwhelmed with all the things they have to do.

They’re not clear on who their dream customer is.

They have too many offers.

They do too many things to try and get awareness and leads.

They’re not clear on how to enroll people into their programs.

They use too many different softwares that they have to glue together with zaps and rubber bands.

They work too hard for their clients and end up burning out, even though they love to coach.

Do any of these resonate wit…

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Business as philanthropy

Most people have an understanding of business that it’s about profits, or perhaps shareholder value.

To me, that’s such a limited worldview to come from.

The only thing that matters, in the end, is love. It's the relationships we're able to build through life. Starting with the relationship with ourselves, and flowing outwards from there.

Nothing else truly matters.

If you don’t have integrity, you have nothing.

If you don’t have love, you have nothing.

There are people who will go make a …

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How to give feedback that increases the connection

I'll be honest, I've long struggled with giving effective, candid feedback to my team.

I value connection a lot, and I didn't know how to tell people that their performance wasn't where I needed it to be.

Instead, I'd try and adapt myself, which would build resentment.

And then at one point, I'd suddenly had enough, and I'd tell them.

But in order to do that, psychologically I would make them wrong, and I'd disconnect, which made the whole thing even more jarring and painful for both of us.

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What is success to you?

When you focus on the distance between where you are and where you want to go, you will inevitably get sad and depressed.⁠ ⁠

When you focus on how far you've come, you feel more confident and good about yourself.⁠ ⁠

Absolutely have a vision and a goal.⁠ ⁠

But you'll go crazy if you focus on that every single day and beat yourself up because you're not there.⁠ ⁠

Success is found in an optimal daily experience, not in reaching a goal post.⁠

Don't focus on far you have yet to go.

Be grateful …

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You have two options

You've tried beating yourself up for years and years and years⁠.

Where has that gotten you?⁠

How about trying something new?⁠

How about loving yourself for a change?

Maybe you're afraid that if you loved yourself you'd stop improving.⁠

That if you loved yourself, it’d be tantamount to staying the same forever.

That you’d never get to where you want to get to in life and in business.

That's not true.⁠

In fact, the exact opposite is true.⁠

Your self-hate, your self-criticism, your self-judgment…

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Figure out what’s yours and what’s someone else’s

As an entrepreneur—especially when you’re small or just starting out—it can feel like there’s so much to do.

You have to learn to write, to sell, to create a landing page, to do customer research, to record and edit videos, to create content for social, maybe a podcast … there’s just so many things. And that’s not even counting the actual teaching or coaching or what have you.

It’s a lot.

The key, though, is to know what of this is yours to figure out, and what is someone else’s to figure out…

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Who's in charge

It’s a lot of pressure being an entrepreneur. Especially a solo entrepreneur.

All the responsibility rests on your shoulders.

The fear of making the wrong decision.

The fear of not being able to make ends meet.

The fear of wasting your money. Your time. Other people’s attention.

The fear of what other people think. The fear of judgment or criticism.

Fear of failure. Fear of success.

It’s a lot to deal with.

Whenever I find myself in this situation, I stop and ask: Who’s in charge?


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Connection, cont'd

I wrote last week about community and connection.

I’ve been thinking about an idea that I wanted to run by you.

I want to create an office here in New York, and later on another one in Austin.

It would be a place where I and other New York/Austin-based team members would work out of at least 2-3 days a week.

But it would be more than that.

It would be a gathering place for the tribe, the community.

A place where you, as the proud owner of information business, could come and record your co…

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Community and connection

I’ve been feeling a bit lonely lately.

Are you feeling the same?

I got a great team I get to work with. A great wife. I get to travel and meet people, which I love.

But my day-to-day when at home, working, in front of the computer, is draining me.

Yes, I get to hang with people on zoom.

But it’s not the same as hanging with people IRL.

Do you feel that way, too?

It’s interesting because I used to love that. If I could avoid having any contact with people, that was the best. Just leave me …

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You know when it's right

If there's one lesson I've learned (over and over again) this past couple of years, it's that when a working relationship is right, you know it.

In fact, I'd scratch "work" from that sentence.

If you question the relationship, it's cause it's probably not right.

Your gut knows.

But so many times, I've tried to make it work anyway.

I deeply care about the people I work with.

I see their potential.

I see what's possible for them if they want it.

I see what we could create together.

But if…

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