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Integrated Entrepreneurship

Are You Too Making This Deadly Feedback Mistake?

Do you ever have trouble giving honest feedback when someone isn’t meeting your expectations or living up to their agreements?

I mean, we’re kind people, right?

We don’t want to hurt people’s feelings.

They might feel upset or sad.

So … we just ignore it. 

Hope that things get better on their own.

Hope they “get the message”.

Well … how’s that workin’ out for ya?

Not so well, is it?

The thing is that, yeah, it might sting a...

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Step back to move forwards

"It sounds like you're in a really great place, but you're maybe trying just a little too hard."

That's what a mentor told me.

It rang true.

A lot.

Does that ever happen for you?

It's an old habit of mine. And I guess old habits die hard.

So I decided to go on a little "spiritual retreat" this weekend.

All at home.

Didn't actually go anywhere ... physically.

But mentally, I went to a much deeper place.

Started asking myself some big questions.

Questions like ...

→ What am I here to...

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How it all started

I told you the story of how I found my life purpose: Integrating spirituality and entrepreneurship in my own life and teaching others to do the same.

Now, you may ask, why? What’s the point?

Great question.

Because it solves pretty much every challenge that we entrepreneurs face.

Challenges such as which direction to go in. What business to start, what values to base it on, what products to offer, what your unique selling proposition is going to be, what strategies to use to build your...

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Why you haven't found your purpose yet

Do you know your purpose in life?

If not, why haven't you found it yet?

I'll tell you why.

Because you haven't looked.

I'm serious.

The truth is, it's not that hard.

But you have to want to know.

I told you about how after I found my purpose, I realized there were three very specific (and strange) fears that had held me back from finding my purpose.

I asked you to guess at what they were.

No-one got them right.

But fear not. I'll tell you now.

Irrational unconscious fear #1:

There was no...

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Why are you here?

Back in the early 2000s, I was really struggling as an entrepreneur.

I started a software consulting company, a professional blogging company, a collaborative CMS software company, a project management software company, a recruiting company, anything I hoped would make me successful.

I'd start a company with anyone that I thought had that "secret success sauce" hoping it would spill over on me and make me successful.

It didn't work.

I got more and more frustrated and spent so much time and...

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You're not wrong

All the years I spent feeling wrong. Oh, man.

I felt like there was definitely something wrong with me, and I needed to be more like ... anybody successful, honestly.

I remember one time I was in Amsterdam with my wife, and we went to this shoe store to shop for her.

The store was small, but it looked pretty cool.

What was my first thought?

I want to be the owner of this store.

Why?

Did I know who he or she was?

Nope!

Did I know the first thing about that person?

Nothing at all. Wasn't even...

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You can have anything you want

Back when I started this business, I was stressed out, scared, lonely.

I was worried about paying rent, feeding my family.

I felt like a failure. Not just as an entrepreneur, but as a father, as a husband, as a son ... 

I felt like a failure as a human being.

I wasn't sure I was ever going to make it.

I was scared I just didn't have what it takes.

And yet, there was a part of me that believed.

A part of me that knew I could make my dreams a reality.

That I could move to America.

That I...

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Engage

Just a quick inspirational note here from the founder of Simplero.

Whenever I go to the gym, I'm always fascinated by all the people there who just seem to dabble a bit.

  • They're on the treadmill, all slumped, just going on a Sunday stroll it seems.
  • Or doing pushups, but their arms are barely moving.
  • Or they're lifting weights, but their muscles are barely working.

I'm always like "what the fuck are you doing here?"

If you're not going to engage, if you're not going to put in effort and...

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Help the kid

Something that's been on my mind a lot lately ...

Whenever you're triggered, emotionally challenged, it's always, and only always, because you're not there for the little boy or little girl that lives inside you.

When you're making that sales call, and you feel scared unworthy ... it's because the little kid inside is having feelings, and you're not there for him or her.

When you're afraid you're not good enough, that you'll get boo'd on stage, that you don't have what it takes ... it's...

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Challenge and love

I love the feeling of rising to a challenge.

Can I do 50 more push-ups?

Can I grow my company by 10x?

Can I lose the fat?

Can I make this business work so I can quit my day job?

--

But sometimes you miss, right?

And how do you feel then?

Do you hate your body for its fat?

Do you get down on yourself for not making enough money?

...

We need both the challenge and the love.

We need to be challenged. Preferably by ourselves.

And we need to be loved unconditionally. Again, definitely by...

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